New Viniyoga Videos for Anxiety and Depression

Like many viniyoga teachers, I’m not a huge fan of yoga videos, as the video format doesn’t allow for the customization and adaptation to the individual that is such a hallmark of this rich lineage.  Still, as much as I’d like everyone to experience yoga first hand at Whole Life Yoga or work with me privately, I know that for many students, videos provide a much more convenient and accessible connection to a consistent yoga practice.  Who knows…maybe someday I’ll even create a video of my own!  ;-)

Until then, two new viniyoga videos have recently been released by my teacher, Gary Kraftsow, on topics that are personally important to me:  Yoga for Anxiety and Yoga for Depression. I’ve suffered from both conditions off and on throughout my life, and yoga has been an incredible powerful tool in helping me manage my symptoms. I may have come to yoga to overcome back pain, but by far the first and most important thing to heal was my heart.

Gary’s new products introduce the viniyoga therapy approach to anxiety and depression.  They are a bit different than typical videos, in that he provides cognitive learning in addition to yoga practice.  Each video contains approximately an hour of lecture on yoga therapy and its applications for anxiety and depression, along with two practices: one that is a bit over thirty minutes and one that is closer to an hour.  Even more unusual, the practices aren’t just asana, or movement.  They contain multiple facets of the rich and dynamic viniyoga lineage:  Asana (movement), Pranayama (breath work), Meditation, and Chanting.

I sell both of these at the studio, along with a few other viniyoga videos.  But they can also be purchased at amazon.com and via other on line sellers.  Of course, I’d much rather see your bright shining faces at the studio, but these videos may provide a nice addition to your collection and to your practice.  Let me know what you think!

Namaste

Tracy Weber

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Asana, Breath, Meditation, Therapeutic Yoga, Viniyoga | Leave a comment

A New Perspective, a New Yoga

This week’s blog entry was written by guest author Jacqui Trent. Jackqui is a current student  of Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program.  She  can be contacted at jacquitrent@gmail.com.

Like so many people in America, I was drawn to yoga as the next big workout craze.  Boasting arms like Jennifer Aniston and abs like Madonna, yoga promised a “hot bod” – something very appealing to a twenty one year old with a poor body image. So for the next couple of years I took classes on and off at my gym.

I enjoyed it, but I wasn’t getting enough out of it.  Going only when I felt like it, i.e. when I was feeling really “fat”, I didn’t have a strong practice.  The teachers at the gym were good teachers, but they were restricted.  They couldn’t teach pranayama, bandhas, or anything related to yoga that wasn’t a pose.

And then my husband lost his job.  The next two years were really tough.  Things were tight and the stress really ate away at me.  Going against what everyone I knew told me, I took on the stress of two jobs.  Working twelve hour days baking and cleaning houses. It was draining and the extra income wasn’t easing my stress level like I had expected.  Finally the stress was eating away at me and I knew I had to do something. A we search led me to a local yoga studio that offered two months of unlimited yoga for the price of one.

Almost immediately after my first week I was hooked.  My body took to the practice right away and I loved how much better I felt. Leaving my stress at the door and just focusing on me for that hour was amazing!  I was taking most of my classes from the studio owner; she became my favorite. I loved her classes.

I had been with the studio for a few months, when my instructor announced that she would be conducting her first teacher training program starting in January.  Recently I had been considering teaching yoga and was thrilled to get the chance to learn from her.

However, shortly after the program started I wasn’t as excited.  Let’s just say that the training was supposed to last fifteen months and we didn’t even make it half way.  For many reasons it became a toxic environment and we finally had to dissolve the program. We kept telling each other it was going to get better, but in reality it was only getting worse.

I found out about the viniyoga training through one of the amazing woman with whom I bonded with during this experience. She had found out about Tracy and Whole Life Yoga and had joined her upcoming training program. It started in two weeks and encouraged us to contact her.

At first I didn’t know if I was ready. I was so shaken from my last experience that my practice had suffered. I’ll admit I knew nothing of viniyoga, and didn’t know if I should join a program that was foreign to me. After I heard about its therapeutic qualities, I wondered if this wasn’t exactly what I needed.

I still have a lot to learn about viniyoga. This lineage is so different from any style I’d ever tried. My prior knowledge was more focused on form and adjustments. Sometimes the benefits would become compromised when you’re trying to achieve the perfect form, not paying attention to what’s going on in the body.  I really appreciate the fact that there is much more of an emphasis on the benefits of a pose, not making it perfect.

The pace is different from what I’m used to as well. People, including myself, seem to be caught up in the newest yoga fad of a fast paced flow.  But I like that this style seems to be more mindful and intentional. I can’t see myself completely abandoning flow practice, but I do see how others, myself included, can benefit from a viniyoga practice.

The opportunity to study viniyoga came to me at a time when my own practice was broken.  Just like it is used to rehabilitate someone with problems with their back, sacrum or hip, it’s become my tapas and reignited my practice.

Jacqui

More information about Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program can be found at our web site:  Yoga Teacher Training at Whole Life Yoga.

Posted in Asana, Guest Writers, Teacher Training, Therapeutic Yoga, Viniyoga | Leave a comment

Yoga Teachings on Anxiety–A Teacher’s Personal Application

“I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” Mark Twain

At the risk of annoying some of my readers, today’s blog is personal. As many of you know, I adore my dog. Not the normal, socially acceptable kind of affection most people feel for their pets. Not even the deep love I’ve felt for the dozens of animals I’ve shared my life with in the past. My love for Tasha is inherently, insanely deeper than that. I have found in her a relationship of loyalty and unconditional love that astounds me every day. I’ve never been happier in my life than I have been since the day my husband and I adopted her.

One of the more controversial teachings of yoga is that we should beware of great joy, for buried in the midst of great joy is great suffering. Instead, the teachings say, we should seek peace. In other words, beware of great attachments, because inevitably they come at a price. Although none of us know the future, I have a pretty good idea what the price of loving Tasha will be. After all, her expected lifespan is significantly shorter than mine. Yet still I delude myself, live in the moment, and ignore the future.

When I found a swelling in her breast last Friday, I was concerned but not panicked. When the vet said we should do a biopsy, I was concerned, but not panicked. When the biopsy came back as “inconclusive,” well, that was the final straw. I panicked.

You see, I have a history of anxiety. Yoga helps me keep it under control, but evidently I still have work to do. And we anxiety sufferers know that the nothing feeds our inner demon  more effectively than the unknown.

According to the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, the purpose of yoga is to decrease the exact sort of suffering I feel now by gaining control over the minds five random activities, or vrttis. Sutras 1.5 – 1.11 outline the mind’s five activities.

  • Correct perception
  • Misperception
  • Memory
  • Imagination
  • Deep dreamless sleep

People who suffer from anxiety are often overwhelmed by three of the above.

  • Misperception. Seeing things not as they are, but “colored” in some way. For me in this moment, I see the word “inconclusive” as evil. In reality, it means we don’t know. It is by definition, neither good nor bad.
  • Memory. Particularly as it relates to similar, unpleasant things that have happened in the past. In this case, I remember my favorite cat. He died on the table during a routine teeth cleaning. No surgical procedure really feels low risk when I remember that.
  • Imagination. Those of us with anxiety are masters at imagining the worst, or as Albert Ellis called it “awfulizing.” The future my crazed mind has come up with would be laughable if it weren’t so real to me.

So how do the teachings help me and others like me? Well first, the sutras are very clear. One activity of the mind predominates most of our psyches: Error. And the teachings of psychology show us that in the absence of information, the mind creates a story that is worse than reality about 90% of the time. So no matter what horror story I create in my mind, I can rest assured that I’m probably wrong, and that whatever I’m imagining is worse than reality. I find comfort in that.

Second, yoga gives us specific practices to combat the hold the mind has over us. I’ve written about two specific practices in prior blogs that are useful in cases of anxiety:

So, I will continue to spend time in my practice, and I hope each of you will as well. Yoga’s biggest gift to us has so little to do with our bodies. Its biggest gift is increased inner peace.

Time for me to practice what I preach.

Namaste.

Tracy

PS–And truly coincidentally, I’m teaching a yoga class for anxiety soon. Check it out at http://www.wholelifeyoga.com/anxiety.html

A follow up several days later.

The yoga teachings were right again.  My mind was in error.  “Inconclusive” may have meant we didn’t know, but now we do.  The follow-up appointment with the vet this morning showed no cancer.  ;-)  Guess I get to keep my attachment to this lovely beast awhile longer.

Posted in Breath, Meditation, Yoga Philosophy | 3 Comments

My Hips Story

This week’s blog entry was written by guest author Sheryl Stich. Sheryl is a graduate of Whole Life Yoga’s 500 hour teacher training program and an instructor at Whole Life Yoga. She can be contacted at sheryl@calmawakenings.com.

Our bodies are made up of a complex matrix of muscles, bones, organs, energy, nerves and emotions. Our hips are centrally located and intricately connected with the rest of the body. Because of theses interconnections, it can sometimes be a challenge to determine where pain originates. We can even have problems in one area of the body, but we experience the discomfort in another area of the body, called referred pain.

When I was 22 I started to have pain in my right low back, which traveled down to my knee and foot. The doctors thought I had tense muscles in my back and gluts and gave me exercises to help relieve the tightness. After 17 years of unrelenting pain, and working with various doctors and therapists, my primary care physician sent me for an x-ray of my hip joint. There it was, plain as day – the cartilage was almost non-existent, which was causing the pain in my back, and referring pain down my leg. The doctor said the only way to fix it was to have a total hip replacement. I said, “This pain can be fixed? Sign me up!” I had no injuries or other things that might cause the cartilage to erode. Many of my family members had hip replacements, so my problem was probably genetic. The surgery was highly successful. Afterwards the pain was virtually gone! Amazing – what was thought to be back pain was actually being caused by my hip joint.

Several years later, terrible pain suddenly started shooting from my other hip joint down the front of my leg. I was certain something had happened to that hip joint, so I went immediately to my orthopedic surgeon. When I described the location of the pain, he told me it was a disc in my back, not my hip joint. “Funny, I thought, this time I think it’s my hip, and it’s actually my back.” I had surgery to trim the bulging disc, which immediately relieved the pain, but left me feeling a need to do something to help preserve my joints and hopefully stave off future surgeries.

I decided to start practicing yoga. As I was walking down Greenwood Avenue one day I noticed Whole Life Yoga and met Tracy Weber as she was opening the front door. I told her about my back and hip surgeries, and asked if this would be a good yoga for me? The answer was a resounding “yes!” She explained the benefits of Viniyoga to me, and I started taking classes that week.

After a few years of yoga practice, I took the Whole Life Yoga basic, and then advanced teacher training programs. As I was designing a hips practice for myself for the training, it occurred to me that others might also benefit from the practice, so I developed Yoga for Happy Hips class. In this past year I have had a hip revision surgery on my right side to replace the worn out synthetic cartilage from my 16-year old original hip replacement (when it was first replaced, the estimated life span was ten years). I believe my yoga practice helped me to lengthen the life of the joint by keeping the muscles around my hip joint strong and flexible. My left hip joint has lost a significant amount of cartilage over the years, so I practice to keep that hip strong and flexible too.

Through yoga, I have learned to listen to my body. When I have pain, yoga helps me not only physically, but helps me remain more calm and relaxed which helps reduce stress and discomfort. I truly enjoy helping my students by sharing my knowledge and experience with them, whether it’s tight muscles, stress, injuries or the myriad of other challenges that can cause hip discomfort.

Sheryl

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Asana, Guest Writers, Teacher Training, Teacher Training Graduate Stories, Therapeutic Yoga, Viniyoga | Leave a comment

A Simple Meditation for Greater Mindfulness and Peace

Meditation is one of my favorite practices, in that it is so simple, yet so incredibly powerful.  When I have a consistent meditation practice I am more mindful, more focused, more calm in the face of challenge.  When I don’t, life is just plain harder.  Meditation doesn’t erase the challenges of life. (And who among us doesn’t have challenges?)  But it makes me less reactive to them and clearer in distinguishing between what is  important and what is not;  What I can control and what I cannot; What is real and what is a crazy trick of my overactive imagination. 

Many students I speak with assert that they “can’t” meditate.  That when they try to meditate, their mind wanders.   Frankly, so does mine.  My chattering mind often sounds like the soundtrack to a bad episode of the Jerry Springer show. 

It doesn’t matter. 

Meditation is not the act of sitting still with a perfectly quiet mind.  Meditation is simply the act of noticing when your mind wanders and inviting it back–again, and again, and again.  The beauty is that every time you notice your mind wander and bring it back, you are learning to control your thoughts instead of letting them control you.  You may not notice the effects while you’re meditating, but I guarantee you’ll notice them in your daily life.  You’ll be calmer, clearer, and likely kinder.  Your loved ones will thank you!

Research shows that as little as 10 minutes a day of meditation 3 times a week yields significant benefits in health and mental well being.     Give it a try and see what happens.   It won’t be easy, but it is simple.  Just breathe, and notice.

Breath Focused Meditation:

  1. Sit comfortably, with your spine erect and the crown of your head floating up to the ceiling.  Sitting either in a chair or on the floor is fine, as long as you are physically comfortable and your spine is in “neutral”. 
  2. Allow your eyes to close or keep your eyes at “half mast” gazing quietly at a place below and in front of you.
  3. Notice your breath—without intentionally trying to change it.  Feel the warmth and coolness of the breath at the tip of your nostrils.  Allow your mind to focus on and pay attention to this feeling of the breath.
  4. If your attention wanders (and it will!) just notice it, and invite your attention back to the sensation of the breath at the tip of your nose.  Try not to criticize yourself.  Instead congratulate yourself for bringing the attention back to the point of focus.
  5. Continue this meditation for 10 minutes or longer if you’d like.

Let me know how it works for you!

Namaste,

Tracy Weber

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Meditation | 4 Comments

An Exercise in New Year’s Resolutions

This week’s blog entry was written by guest author Jennifer Campbell. Jennifer is a graduate of Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program. She  can be contacted at jenniecc@hotmail.com

For several years, every January 1, I would wake up early and pound out a few miles on the treadmill.  I told myself this would be the year – the year I would to lose weight, or finally take up running, or attain those mythical six pack abs.  I made elaborate schedules for my exercise and tried to move my 6:45 wake up time to 5 am so I’d have time to work out in the morning.

And every year, I kept it up for about a week.  Sometimes for two weeks.  But by the end of January, I’d have given up, only to try again the following year.

This year, I knew that I wanted to make exercise a New Year’s Resolution, but that I wanted to actually follow though for the whole year.  There was a small part of me that thought maybe I should give pylometrics or circuit training a try, and what is this HIIT stuff that I keep hearing about?!  But I stopped myself.  My schedule is a little too busy right now, and besides – the exercise that I really love is yoga.

Last summer, I attended a yoga workshop with Donna Farhi and she discussed the two different kinds of exercise – the kind that requires or depletes energy, and the kind that restores energy.

Her point was that we need both in our lives, and that yoga can fulfill either.  But what I’m taking from it in thinking about my New Year’s Resolution for this year, is that my life is pretty stressful right now – I’m working and in school full time.  It takes a lot of energy.  What I really need at this moment in my life is the kind of exercise that restores energy.

To me, that means long meditative walks, and finally trying Qi Gong (I’ve been meaning to try that for months).  Things that bring movement to my body, but that leave me feeling refreshed, rather than exhausted.  And actually, that fits better with my exercise goals, which are not to get an intense workout, but to improve my posture (my posture sucks), relieve stress, sleep better.

And of course, I’ll be practicing plenty of yoga.

Jennifer Campbell

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Asana, Guest Writers, Teacher Training Graduate Stories | 1 Comment

Can Yoga Wreck Your Body? Response to a Student Question

I look forward to answering your questions in this blog.  Please feel free to leave a comment or e-mail your questions to tracy@wholelifeyoga.com.

A student asks:   Do you have a response to the New York Times article  article called “How Yoga Can Wreck Your Body?”   As a yoga teacher, how can I be safe in my own teaching and practice?  A link to the article is below.

How Yoga Can Wreck Your Body

Thanks for the question.  I’ve been forwarded this article several times in the past 24 hours.  Let me start with a qualification to my response:  I teach in a lineage, viniyoga, that is known for its conservative approach, and even within that lineage, I am known as a conservative teacher.  I have long been concerned about the injury rate and what I consider negligent practices in many public yoga classes. So I can’t really disagree with much of the article.

However, the article also makes me sad, because it lumps all asana practices together into one bucket.  Although I do believe most lineages have similar philosophical teachings, our physical practices differ considerably.  So to say the injury rate is the same among all is a gross oversimplification—and just plain incorrect.  When I read the specific practices the article cited as being unsafe, I kept saying to myself “But I would never teach that.” 

Many public yoga classes do, however.  For example, the head of my lineage has specifically asked that we never teach headstand in group asana classes, due to the unacceptable level of risk.  Therefore I do not, nor do I allow headstand to be taught at my studio, unless it is part of my yoga teacher training program.  However, I’ve had many students tell me they were taught headstand in beginner classes at other venues.

I believe this is a mistake.  Many, most even, of the benefits of yoga can be achieved in simpler, safer poses than the ones seen on the cover of Yoga Journal.

All that said, I find it interesting that the teacher in the article claiming to be a proponent of safer yoga said to his class, “I make it as hard as possible. It’s up to you to make it easy on yourself.”  This is, in a word, wrong.

I firmly believe it is up to us as teachers to teach a class that isn’t as hard as possible.  But to teach our students how to be mindful and aware of how their body is served when it’s not working “as hard as possible.” Our work is to teach our classes in a way that is accessible and safe.

Now no physical practice, including yoga, will ever be 100% risk free.  Neither is walking down the street.  We can never guarantee a student won’t suffer an injury in a yoga class.  But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do everything in our power to keep our classes safe.

Which comes back to your question.  What can we do as teachers?

First, get training.  Then get more training.  Study a lineage, like viniyoga, that focuses on understanding the physical issues of a student and adapts the practice of yoga to that student.  This involves not only teaching mindfulness in practice, but also using physical adaptation of postures and specific sequencing principles that maximize the benefits of yoga while minimizing its risks. Shy away from teachers and yoga styles that believe “one form fits all” regardless of the physical structure of the student.

Second, understand the level of your students and teach to that level.  Not your own level.  Not what your students wish was their level. Not even what your students think is their level.  You will lose some students this way.  But you will gain others.

Just yesterday I had two new students in my class.  They didn’t know each other, and they had different yoga experiences in the past.  Both of them came up to me after class and thanked me for making my “all levels” class accessible to them.  They told me they had been frightened to take a yoga class again, after having been asked to do things beyond their level in other “all levels” yoga classes in other venues.

“All levels” classes should be accessible to all levels.  Not taught to experienced students with the assumption that beginners and students with injuries will know when something is unsafe for them and choose not to do it.  And beginner’s classes should be beginner’s level.  Period.

Finally, if you don’t know how to keep a student safe in your class, don’t teach to that student.  There are cases in which a given class is not appropriate for a student.  We can’t be shy about letting him or her know that.  The more training and experience you have, the more you will be able to accommodate a wide variety of students.  But even with the highest level of training, group yoga classes aren’t appropriate for everyone.  Know when to say “no.”

I hope that helps!

Tracy Weber

More information about Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program can be found at our web site:  Yoga Teacher Training at Whole Life Yoga.

Posted in Asana, Student Questions, Teacher Training, Teaching Yoga, Viniyoga | 14 Comments

Yoga Poses to Strengthen Knees

I look forward to answering your questions in this blog.  Please feel free to leave a comment or e-mail your questions to tracy@wholelifeyoga.com.

Barbara asks:  What are some knee strengthening exercises and/or exercises to strengthen the muscles around the knees?

This question, like most, has many facets.  Yoga postures can help improve some knee issues.  The trick is figuring out how to do those poses in a way that doesn’t further harm the knee while we’re trying to heal it.  This challenge isn’t unique to yoga.  When I met with a surgeon over 20 years ago to determine whether my own knee condition warranted surgery, he told me that physical therapy exercises for knees had changed, because some of the traditional exercises damaged the “good” knee while rehabbing the injured one.

Therefore, when we work therapeutically with knees, we first must obey the old adage “do no harm.”  This sometimes means adapting poses so that the practitioner doesn’t perform poses in a kneeling position.  Chair adaptations work wonderfully for this.

Then we must make sure that the practitioner uses proper body alignment for her own structure.  Contrary to some yoga philosophies, there is no “right” standard of alignment that can be universally applied.  It must be discovered via observation and experimentation with each individual.

Beyond that, the goal is to make sure the muscles that support the knee joint are balanced: that the hips, quadriceps, hamstrings and calves are flexible and strong in a balanced way.  Simply strengthening one muscle group over another may do more harm than good, especially if we ignore the opposing muscle groups and don’t pay attention to overall flexibility.

That said, below are a couple of my favorite postures for strengthening the quadriceps and hamstrings.  Please be aware, however, that unless I work with a client one-on-one and observe their specific condition, I can’t know for sure what is needed to help this complex and surprisingly fragile joint.  Therefore, proceed with caution and please discontinue these postures if they cause any discomfort in your knee or anywhere else!

Strengthening poses for knees:

Note:  Please remember that Viniyoga is a dynamic practice.  Even though the pictures below show static postures, each should be repeated dynamically, and each repetition should be connected with the breath.

Half Squat Against a Wall: This pose strengthens the quadriceps, hamstrings and hips.  When doing this pose, please stand on a non skid surface.  As you move into the squat, make sure that your knees track over the center of your feet and do not extend beyond your toes.  Also make sure to keep your hips higher than your knees.

Bridge, gently squeezing a blanket or ball between the knees: This pose also strengthens quadriceps and hamstrings, along with other muscles.   As with the squat, do not let your knees go behind your toes.  Squeezing the blanket engages the inner thigh muscles and promotes correct positioning of the feet.  Always keep both edges of the feet and all ten toes on the ground.

Cobra, bending the knees: This back strengthener also promotes mobility in the knee join and builds strength in the hamstrings.  You can either bend one knee at a time or both.  Flexing the foot as you bend the knee and imagining that you are wearing an ankle weight deepens the work.

Thank you for your question, and I hope this helps!

Namaste

Tracy Weber

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Asana, Student Questions, Therapeutic Yoga, Viniyoga | Leave a comment

Reflections for a New Year

The transition to each New Year can be a powerful time.    Like many, I spend this time reflecting on the past and creating promises to myself for the future.  These promises have ranged from the dramatic to the absurd.   From larger goals, like changing careers, to physical goals, like losing that dreaded final five pounds, to last year’s seemingly frivolous resolution to spend more time on Facebook

The challenge, of course, is in keeping my annual promises.  I start out determined, but over time my discipline wanes, and with it my commitment.  And I know I’m not alone.  The fleeting nature of New Year’s resolutions is obvious both at the health club I attend and in my own yoga classes.  January 1, the studio is filled with enthusiastic students—many back for the first time since the prior January.   By mid February, the crowds begin to thin. By April we have plenty of room to sweep our arms and do those space-demanding twisting postures.

And the cycle continues, both for many of my students and for me.  Many give up making resolutions all together, deciding it’s simply futile.  Believe me, I’ve been tempted.

But in spite of my own struggle with follow-through, I always try again.  Because I know that the process of setting these goals makes me a better person.    If you don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions, that still shouldn’t stop you.  There’s nothing special about January 1.  Every day is an opportunity to reflect, to commit, and to begin again. By doing so, we plant the seeds of intention that will blossom into future actions.  From intention, from thought, comes everything.

The questions below have been adapted from a meditation I learned when I took my first yoga teacher training.    As we begin 2012, I hope you will join me and incorporate these reflections into your yoga practice and your daily life:

  • What are my most important values?
  • How have my recent actions reflected those values?
  • How have my recent communications reflected those values?
  • How have my recent thoughts reflected those values?
  • How can I change my thoughts, communications, and actions to more closely align with my values in the future?

Each of us has the power, through intention and choice, to live a life that embodies our most important priorities.  We simply need to  use that power.

I hope you have a wonderful 2012. May your new year include not only increased mindfulness, but also great joy.  And I hope to see you at Whole Life Yoga soon—not just in January, but throughout the entire year.

Namaste

Tracy Weber

Come visit Whole Life Yoga in Seattle!

Posted in Meditation | Leave a comment

A Yoga Love Story

This week’s blog entry was written by guest author Kim Tull-Esterbrook. Kim is a graduate of Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program, and our newest instructor!  She  can be contacted at kimte@peacemail.com.

 


I did not love yoga when I was first introduced to it in my early 20’s . My short hamstrings and patched together heart found the practice challenging, to say the least, but I knew right away that it was good for me. I could tell that it was a practice that had the potential to change so many of the patterns that felt damaging in my life; but I was unwilling to really dedicate myself to it, or more truthfully, I was afraid. I imagined that I would uncover some horrible truth about myself hidden beneath the surface and so I played with yoga inconsistently for years.

Six years later, while going through the painful transition of a divorce, I found my way to a consistent practice as the only means of keeping myself afloat, but I was a needy partner; opening myself only as far as I felt safe and expecting so much in return. My practice had a one- sided desperation but it saved me in so many ways.

Fast forward 6 more years and with the support of a dear friend, I found my way to Whole Life Yoga’s teacher training program. Finally I was ready to do the work. I moved step by step to open myself and was emotionally prepared for whatever horrible thing I was going to encounter in the depths of my being. What I found was very much a surprise.

Absolutely, there were things that were hard to take about patterns and choices in my life- things that I had been doing to myself to sabotage my own hopes and dreams, but it was also liberating to learn to see things with clarity and without judgement. I learned how to separate my ideas of myself from those layers of habit. I learned the great value of showing up to my practice even when I didn’t want to- when it was hard, when I was distracted, when I felt defeated.

And somewhere in the midst of all that work that I knew was good for me, I found my way to a place where I love my practice. I am not where I thought (or even hoped) I would be when I reached that terrifically adult age of 35. I have not published a book (though maybe this will be my year!), I have not landed that money making job, or even found my way anywhere close to that unattainably beautiful classical King pigeon pose but I pull out my mat almost every day and feel instantly at home.

Through my practice I feel as if I have an outlet for the best parts of me. I have found a way to feel connected to myself, my community and the world. I have found a way to be free. Some days, I think that there is still so much that I don’t know and that is true. On other days, I think this is all I could ever need to know- I take a breath in, I let a breath out. The world feels a bit simpler. It feels like love.

Kim

Please Join Kim in her new classes at Whole Life Yoga!

Posted in Guest Writers, Teacher Training, Teacher Training Graduate Stories, Viniyoga | Leave a comment